The Things We Learn From Spam
- Phillip Mills (TTTO: The Things We Do For Love by 10CC)

So many bureaucrats have tried to launder millions
So many penny stocks are poised to make a run
And Colorado oil will make you rich
The things we learn from spam, the things we learn from spam

Your software needs can be resolved for only pennies
Who wants a real watch when a knock-off's just as good
The proper patch can enlarge anything
The things we learn from spam, the things we learn from spam

Like training for the job of your dreams, newsgroup pyramid schemes
But now E-bay, banks, and PayPal need your log-in
And you've traced the porno headers to Taiwan
You think he's been detected
Your complaint just gets rejected

Ooh you made me track you
Ooh you're gonna pay
Ooh you'll have me squeezing on your throat
(ahem!)

Prescription drugs would surely help your situation
When harder, faster, stronger is your constant goal
And after all it's just one specimen
Of the things we learn from spam, the things we learn from spam
The things we learn from spam